Jonathan: The point of no return

No, actually I didn't have a plan. I was stumbling along, trying to figure out what I felt and whether Missi was just being friendly or actually was interested.

You'd think the daily emails and occasional phone calls would have given me a clue, but she was very good about having a rational excuse for the communication. She's a very friendly person, and so maybe she was just wanting to keep in touch...? The phone calls only came when "I was the only person she could reach," or because it was late, she was driving, and needed someone to keep her awake. Naturally, since I'm 3 hours earlier, she thought I wouldn't mind.

I did come to the point, however, where I decided I thought she was pretty cool, and that I wouldn't mind if this relationship went somewhere. I needed to get through the Bar first, however, as there was no way I could pass if I started a big new relationship...:)

I had already planned to fly back to VA for Jenna's wedding the weekend after the Bar, and decided that would be a perfect time to talk to Missi face-to-face about what was happening. I planned out what I would say weeks in advance, and found a couple of Xbox games as a "hello" gift (I know, doesn't sound romantic, but I had to pick something that wasn't too romantic while also being personal).

We didn't email much during the week of the Bar, as Missi was trying not to distract me... When I returned from taking the exam I jumped back into the email cycle, expecting her to be excited about me coming out. Hey, after all, I was trying to work up my courage to take a plunge off the cliff and bare my soul, so I was hoping for some increased excitement on her part too. So much for that. She suddenly turned into this monosyllabic pen-pal, barely answering my questions with short, uncharacteristicly bland e-mails. My heart sank, but I was determined to give this a shot, so I packed my bags for Virginia.

I arrived on Friday morning (red-eye flight), and headed to her office to chat. As soon as I walked in her door and saw her lovely face, I knew that I was doing the right thing. We chatted for awhile until I took the plunge, holding my breath the whole way.

"Missi, do you want to go grab a cup of coffee with me tomorrow morning?"